Jack ass

[g-cuda67]

           SO I guess the reason I am bring this up is I really have no idea what to do?
Make a long story short..my only sibling my little sis is getting married to a jack ass.. what do I mean ..well to start he doesn't have a job..gets offerd a 30K plus a year and turns it down because he doesn't feel like it! I tried talking to her about it but it just gets her upset...then she tells him and before you know it i don't see her for three months..now I am really pissed. He is paranoid ..what do I mean by that .well for starters ther is a baseball bat behind every door thats just the tip of it.Known for violence towards unkown males at bars ..dont ask me why ?
  Top it off every guy freind i ever had or even just good duys in general all drooled over her ..she nice, works two jobs as a butcher and take care of this lump of a fiancee....What should i do ?

[instrument]

Do what you want, But I would Do Nothing. It's her life to mess it up as she feels fit. let time clear the water.

[318_Magnum]

That sucks. She'll obviously have to find out on her own though.

But, when the shit hits the fan, which it will, give the Mopar Mafia a holler. We'll take care of that turd...

[Ed]

Me and my little brother's always had a talk with my sister's new boyfriends, pull him off alone.  It would go something like, "If you hurt her, we will hunt you down"...and you can fill in the rest.  Never had any problems. 

[g-cuda67]

Me and my little brother's always had a talk with my sister's new boyfriends, pull him off alone. It would go something like, "If you hurt her, we will hunt you down"...and you can fill in the rest. Never had any problems.

     
                yeah me and couple buds did that when they met ,but like i said he is off on the deep end.  maybe the mopar mafia will set me up with some cement shoes....

[g-cuda67]

   Just wanted to mention I apreciate your input guys.

[abqdart]

kick his ass sea bass!

[dusterdarryl]

the best answer you have had so far is the first one,  as for  the other "jack ass" answers. . .  well  just have to let her sort it her self but be there for her when it crashers down around her, but never say . .  oh I told you so. .    you can guide em but you cant push em

[71 demon child]

You know how it is.Every girl wants a bad boy.She will tire of him eventually.You can only fake a good relationship for so long.He'll stay in it as long as he can..it doesen't bother him ,he's a freeloader.She'll get sick of supporting him.She'll come back eventually.

carl

[oldkimmer]

Set him up with a hooker so she can catch them.......did I say cat fight?............kim..........I kinda think it will work.......for some reason......

[dustertogo]

 Maybe get some of her girlfriends to speak to her about it, that way you don't look like the over protective brother. It might open her eyes to the fact he is a loser. The problem is, the way I see it, most women won't break up with a guy unless they have a back-up plan. I'm not saying they are scared of being alone but if she finds someone else se likes it will make things alot easyier. But i'm by no means an expert .

[BIG DOG]

Me and my little brother's always had a talk with my sister's new boyfriends, pull him off alone. It would go something like, "If you hurt her, we will hunt you down"...and you can fill in the rest. Never had any problems.

     
                yeah me and couple buds did that when they met ,but like i said he is off on the deep end.  maybe the mopar mafia will set me up with some cement shoes....

Like some have said she will have to figure it out on her own .The more you protest the more she will side with him or be put in the position of not wanting to be  wrong about him.It's not a good situation I have three daughters that are just reaching their teens .I can just imagine the pricks that are going to be sitting on my couch in the next couple of years GRRRRRR!  (I guess that's pay back ....I was that prick 25 years ago).
If all else fails got a shovel?

[pettyblue72]

yea that sux....but there is not much u can do......she'll have to learn on her own......and it will be hard for u to watch.....but one day she'll come to cry on yer shoulder, and you'll be there for her 

[magart]

Here's something to consider...maybe she really LOVES him. I'm sure we've all dated a loser (M or F)now and then, but often they have one special quality. I've had several girlfriends that my buddies told me to stay away from but did I listen? NOOOOO!! If there's something you like, you'll hang around. When it goes awaay, so will she.  It's her life...let her live it!!!

[1967dart406]

the only thing you can do is show her a little support.  If she is "acting" out and sees that someone  close to her is supporting her, she may change her mind.  If it does fail just be there to help her up.  It will work itself out just let it be and dont let it get to you.

[Megajoltman]

Kill him its the only way 

[Megajoltman]

Anyways my brother inlaw is a total loser goes through jobs like toilet paper, goes out drinking for days, totally screwed up there two girls so on and so on

Everyone talked to her to leave this asshole but she won't

I think your going to have to let here sort this out herself, if you get to involved your not going to see much of your sister, he will make sure of that.

umm on 2nd thought think maybe my first suggestion is best

[Jim_Lusk]

I saw an ex-girlfriend do the exact same thing when she was 18. I heard through some friends that was going to marry a guy who had been married once before for a WEEK (somebody obviously had bad judgement on that one). I met the guy. He was reasonably friendly, but a loser. EVERYBODY (her friends, younger BIGGER brother, parents, etc.) told her the guy was not good enough for her, but she was going through issues with her parents (divorce a couple years earlier and she was always in the middle).

Anyway she married the guy and basically suppoerted him for three years. He couldn't even fix her car when it broke (her brother and father had to do it). One day I was talking to her brother and he told me that Kelly was leaving Rick (Donna and I were the first outside her family that knew about it). Anyway, she and Donna started spending some time together. I got homoe from work one day and Kelly was there, so I finally asked the question I had been dying to ask: WHEN DID YOU KNOW IT WOULDN'T WORK?

Her answer floored me: "From the beginning". So much so that she never changed her name on her dirver's license and never put him on her car registration..........

Your sister knows this guy is no good. It doesn't matter TO HER. The more you protest, the more she is going to cling to him. It's the nature of the beast.......

[keith9291]

 
Killing him is the only true way to rid him out of your life!

I have a little sister that is stuck on loser highway.  He is a big time loser and everyone has told her but it is something she will either learn on her own or end up living with.

[gregpurcell]

Play on the paranoia of this guy. Tell him you'll be watching him. Let him know you have friends in organized crime that owe you favors, and he'll never know when or where. Follow up with hang up calls, cars following him or notes on the car when it's parked different places.

At the same time put a dirty pair of girl's underwear in his car where your sister can find them, send flowers to their address saying thing like "Thanks for last night! Call me!" and sign a girl's name like Candi or Bambi.
Sign him up for free copies of every porn magazine you can find using the foldouts in the book, filled out with his name/address. Do the same on online porn sites. Make certain they all mail him stuff.

Finally, report him to annoymous law enforcement agencies' tip lines saying he is a major drug dealer, a pedophile or a terrorist!
That's a few of MY favorites!

[340fyd]

Play on the paranoia of this guy. Tell him you'll be watching him. Let him know you have friends in organized crime that owe you favors, and he'll never know when or where. Follow up with hang up calls, cars following him or notes on the car when it's parked different places.

At the same time put a dirty pair of girl's underwear in his car where your sister can find them, send flowers to their address saying thing like "Thanks for last night! Call me!" and sign a girl's name like Candi or Bambi.
Sign him up for free copies of every porn magazine you can find using the foldouts in the book, filled out with his name/address. Do the same on online porn sites. Make certain they all mail him stuff.

Finally, report him to annoymous law enforcement agencies' tip lines saying he is a major drug dealer, a pedophile or a terrorist!
That's a few of MY favorites!

I would not want you as my enemy.

[440dstr]

testing 123

[268darts]

Kill him its the only way 

My oldest sister, college grad with a masters, married a loser in 74 and still supports him. This guy's typically had 11 jobs a year. He met an old flame at his dad's funneral a couple of years ago and ran off with her. She's Bi, he's Bi-polar and a real a$$hole. Very abusive mentally. Bi girl figured he's crazy, so she left. He lives in a small town outside of Dallas...has no job and my sis can't wait to run up there to see him every weekend. She even bought him a new truck a few months back. She barely scrapes by while he kicks back and enjoys life. Roooll up another one my friend. Just like the other one...you know how it goes. He also has Hep C and will hopefully die soon.  And for the idiots....uh er..I mean how unfortunate it would be to lose such an asset to our society. Maybe something good will happen to him like a fatal accident. At least my sis could get some cash back.

[moparhead]

My daughter did the same thing and it began with her quiting school and then down hill....3.8grade avg.....
...I did nothing about him  because it would really hurt to lose her for what ever length of time , you know Love is Blind. Time will tell, she finally got into being a vet. tech and is going to be a vet. one day after she completes the coarses she needs to take. I would suggest do nothing...it will work out by itself......

[g-cuda67]

           Thanks guys and girls,well I can't admitt to owning a shovel and bag of lime but I will stay in the backround till she figures it out or etc..funny thing she said she knew he wasn't the one for her.. plus washington state marriage laws entitle her to all of his debt..all student loans ,dui payments etc... I just hate staying on the sidelines,especially since I am her only male relative still alive so the thought of walking her down the isle to this jack ass makes it worse..like the burden of my grandpa's and father input though they are not around to say. As far as Greg's paranoia tricks...I got to say your crafty as hell..you shure your not the mopar mafia's right hand man or the "don" . Well I tried the friends trick just only problem is the only person who's voice will matter is married to "jckass"best friend..what are the odds . If nothing else I at least know I am not the only one going through this kind of agony. Thank you   

[318_Magnum]

Put a 'lil acetone in his beer. Usually works pretty well.

[4spdfury]

my sister has been married to her loser for ten years and still talks about leaving his ass. hes an ok guy but not what i would have hoped she would have  picked. there was an incident with my niece about 7 years ago that almost cost him his life. my mom told me i would be out if the family if i did any thing to him. my sister found out and we dindt talk for a couple of months, she now knows that my family is very important to me and thats one thing you just dont fuk with is my family.

[71 Dart]

As they say, life is a knowledge received through the school of "hard luck", had to change that a bit. But honestly the thing I would most be concerned about is how he treats her, when he is "normal" and when he has been drinking and sniffing, because all losers will show two (at least) personalities. And beleive me if I were her brother the first time the loser phyicially hurt her he's history one way or the other. Otherwise, your sister will soon be "educated" probably the hard way and the sad way.  I feel for you man, your in a terrible situation. Hey, invite her over and just ask her sit down alone and read these post replies...........................    Godd luck to both of you.

[flyboy01]

Me and my little brother's always had a talk with my sister's new boyfriends, pull him off alone. It would go something like, "If you hurt her, we will hunt you down"...and you can fill in the rest. Never had any problems.

     
                yeah me and couple buds did that when they met ,but like i said he is off on the deep end.  maybe the mopar mafia will set me up with some cement shoes....

We just tie his feet to a couple of Ferd small blocks and drop him in the river.   

[urchinhead]

Me and my little brother's always had a talk with my sister's new boyfriends, pull him off alone. It would go something like, "If you hurt her, we will hunt you down"...and you can fill in the rest. Never had any problems.

     
                yeah me and couple buds did that when they met ,but like i said he is off on the deep end.  maybe the mopar mafia will set me up with some cement shoes....

We just tie his feet to a couple of Ferd small blocks and drop him in the river.   

I'd go with Chevy small blocks myself, especially some 307s...

But the bad part is, you just can't tell people who to date. My best friend picks the worst girls in the world, the last one was not only hideously ugly, but was a liar, a loser and was running aroud hitting on other guys ( and girls ) right in front of him ( including my girlfriend ), and he just accepted it. The more I made references like, "You can't take that one home to your parents," and "I liked the last one better," the more of a rift it created between us.
After I just placated him, and told him, "whatever makes you happy..." it ended pretty quickly.

[cudaspaz]

I'm new here so my advice may not be valid, but in my life ,I have realized that no matter what you say, your sister may not be listening now because she thinks that it will get better, but it usually gets worse and she will have to come to that realization herself.

Hopefully she will come to you when she is fed up, but until then there is not much you can do, although i really like the idea someone had about talking to him one on one with the boys.

I 'll bet you this guys is really good looking but has nothing else to offer her.

Sad but alot of girls go for the handsome jackass.
My 18 y/o daughter is in the same boat and we have been trying to get her away from her first boyfriend.
She went straight to the billy bad ass, rebel without a clue.
She thinks she can change him, but he is way too narcissistic for that.

The only thing we can do is make her live by our rules while she still lives with us, but I did let him know in not so many words that if he hurts her, he is all mine.